In the Land of the Philistines

In the spring of 2007, I was faced with a terrible decision: whether or not to leave the school I had been at for the previous six years.  I had already signed the "I haven't decided" box on my letter of intent to let my school know that I was exploring other options.  I found out a couple of weeks later that my boss took all "I haven't decideds" as personal affronts to his authority and leadership (he is an overly zealous believer in "From Good to Great) and considered such answers as the same as "I will not be returning."  He was already interviewing for my position and had found a candidate for my position.  After some push back by some parents and school board members on my behalf, he sat down and actually talked to me one on one (something he had never done before).  He told me that they wanted to keep me and that if the problem was money, something could be worked out.  It was a very amicable conversation, and knowing that if I talked openly about my concerns about the school that I would be burning my bridges with him, I probably left him with the impression that I needed better benefits for the newly minted twin boys.  In truth, I thought he was a brilliant man with a great plan, but a terrible person.  He gave me a week to give him a final answer.  I didn't realize until later that the deadline was actually quite flexible.

It was a Friday when that deadline came up.  The week had been difficult for me.  I loved the faculty and students at the school.  I made a list of reasons to leave.  The list was over a page long.  Still I hesitated.  The students had just given me a van the year before.  How could I leave that? 

The day of decision was a teacher workday.  I could get nothing done as I agonized over the decision.  I paced my classroom seeking some clear sign.  Finally, I picked up a Bible.  It was one of a stack of ones from lost and found that I kept in my room.  At a loss for wisdom, I decided to do the blind flip.  For those of you not familiar with this process, let me explain.  You close your eyes and open the Bible to a random place.  Then you open your eyes and read the first thing you see.  I have always seen this like using the Bible as a giant Christian Ouija board and do not recommend it as genuine process of Bible study and wisdom seeking, but I was desperate and I no longer give a snobbish snort inside my head when someone confesses to doing it.

The first verse I read as a result of my blind flip was somewhere in the Old Testament.  I do not remember the exact verse, but the words advised me to take up my stuff and go somewhere else.  It might have been in Job or Isaiah or even in Acts.  The advice was so exact that I laughed at the coincidence and did another blind flip for amusement.

The second blind flip lead me to this verse from 1 Samuel 27:
1 And David said in his heart, I shall now perish one day by the hand of Saul: there is nothing better for me than that I should speedily escape into the land of the Philistines; and Saul shall despair of me, to seek me any more in any coast of Israel: so shall I escape out of his hand.

I laughed again but uneasily this time.  I kept a thumb on that page as I did another blind flip.

The third blind flip lead me to these verses from Exodus 12:
30And Pharaoh rose up in the night, he, and all his servants, and all the Egyptians; and there was a great cry in Egypt; for there was not a house where there was not one dead.


31And he called for Moses and Aaron by night, and said, Rise up, and get you forth from among my people, both ye and the children of Israel; and go, serve the LORD, as ye have said.

32Also take your flocks and your herds, as ye have said, and be gone; and bless me also.

I sent my e-mail within half and hour and have never regretted it.

Peace
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