Yesterday, I lost one of my freshmen. She returned to her home in New Orleans. She has been with us for the last three weeks. She is an intelligent, confident, and hardworking student, and I am sad to see her go. I told her that I was sorry that we were losing her, but glad that she was getting to go home. She retorted wistfully that she wasn't so glad because she loved it here and wanted to stay. This moment made me swell with pride for my students and the many ways that they had embraced her. She experienced little of the discomfort and pain of the "new student". If only my students would respond with the same kind of love for every new student.
This student's presence led to a very awkward moment for me. The day after she arrived we were discussing Lord of the Flies and I connected the breakdown of the boys' society with the craziness in New Orleans (which now looks like it wasn't as bad as the media reported it). I forgot she was in my class; I think my words were something like "The boys on the island are just like the people down in New Orleans who went crazy after the hurricane". A couple of students on the back row started giggling. It was my New Orleans student and the girl at her table. The rest of the class soon remembered her presence and also started laughing at my discomfiture. I admitted, "Well, this is awkward" and offered a very lame qualification of my remarks. I approached her after class to apologize if she had been offended by my remarks. She thought it was funny and claimed not to have cared. I hope she didn't.
Peace
30 September 2005
29 September 2005
Saturday School
I have the privilege of hosting Saturday School this Saturday. I say "privilege" as each student will personally give me $25.00 to baby-sit him or her for four hours. Currently, there are seven students signed up for this special time. That comes out to $43 an hour (and change). Knife fights have at times broken out in the staff room for the right to host a SS. Two years ago I came home with $350.
A husband-wife team at our school pocketed $500, used the money to purchase five tickets for a school drawing for a vintage Ford Mustang. They won, sold the Mustang, and pocketed somewhere around $7,000 (I’m guessing). I couldn’t think of a couple more deserving, but that didn’t stop me from wallowing in a bit of jealousy.
I will either use this school bonus time at union wages to accomplish some real work (I have about 100 pages of papers to grade), or I shall endeavor to do some live blogging. Honestly, I will probably read online news for the first two hours, edit old posts (I know its wrong, but I can’t help myself), add more things to my Amazon wish list (currently at twenty items), and rearrange the items on my desktop (the physical one).
Peace
Update: I am up to 9 students. 9*25=$225 or $56.25/hour
A husband-wife team at our school pocketed $500, used the money to purchase five tickets for a school drawing for a vintage Ford Mustang. They won, sold the Mustang, and pocketed somewhere around $7,000 (I’m guessing). I couldn’t think of a couple more deserving, but that didn’t stop me from wallowing in a bit of jealousy.
I will either use this school bonus time at union wages to accomplish some real work (I have about 100 pages of papers to grade), or I shall endeavor to do some live blogging. Honestly, I will probably read online news for the first two hours, edit old posts (I know its wrong, but I can’t help myself), add more things to my Amazon wish list (currently at twenty items), and rearrange the items on my desktop (the physical one).
Peace
Update: I am up to 9 students. 9*25=$225 or $56.25/hour
28 September 2005
What I did with my Governor's Holiday
For those of you unaware of Governor Perdue's (GA-GOP) decree of this past Friday, the esteemed governor of our state announced on Friday afternoon that he was requesting that all Georgia schools close on Monday and Tuesday. I will not belabor you with my political response to the decision. Instead, I will belabor you with my personal response to the decision.
1. Unaware of the announcement, left school on Friday afternoon with none of my usual planning/grading burden and planning on taking the weekend off from schoolwork.
2. After receiving a phone call from my mother telling me of the announcement, spent the next seven hours wondering if our school (a small, private school) would follow the governor's advice.
3. Tried to sleep without knowing how long my weekend would be.
4. Woke up early, logged on, and discovered that our school would be closed.
5. Spent the rest of the weekend waiting for the call, "We will be closed, but we would like teachers to come in for a full teachers' workday."
6. Logged on to the internet as much as possible using dial-up. We do not have call waiting.
7. Considered blogging.
8. Purchased Star Wars Galactic Battlegrounds Complete at Walmart for $9.99.
9. Played Battleground.
10. Disappointed to discover Galactic Battlegrounds is Age of Kings with different sound effects.
11. Played Galactic Battleground anyway.
12. Looked up the cheat codes.
13. Played several battles where I made my enemy the Gungans. I played the Empire. Me so cruel.
14. Watched Alexander on pay-per-view while my family was away.
15. Wished I had that $3.99 back.
16. Wished I had those three hours back.
17. Considered blogging.
18. Ate a grinder.
19. Tried to start reading "Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde" seven times.
20. Considered mowing the grass.
21. Killed the biggest spider I have ever seen in a home. It was very crunchy. Like stepping in new-fallen snow, only unpleasant.
22. Watched Arrested Development, House, Simpsons. Enjoyed them roughly in that order.
23. Considered blogging.
24. Cleaned 1/2 of a room.
25. Received three magazines: Military History Quarterly, First Things, and National Geographic. Read parts of all three. Best line comes from First Things; the author quotes PG Wodehouse as (roughly) "She looked as if she had been poured into her dress and had forgotten to say when!" Reminded me of some proms that I have chaperoned. Actually, every prom that I have chaperoned.
Peace
1. Unaware of the announcement, left school on Friday afternoon with none of my usual planning/grading burden and planning on taking the weekend off from schoolwork.
2. After receiving a phone call from my mother telling me of the announcement, spent the next seven hours wondering if our school (a small, private school) would follow the governor's advice.
3. Tried to sleep without knowing how long my weekend would be.
4. Woke up early, logged on, and discovered that our school would be closed.
5. Spent the rest of the weekend waiting for the call, "We will be closed, but we would like teachers to come in for a full teachers' workday."
6. Logged on to the internet as much as possible using dial-up. We do not have call waiting.
7. Considered blogging.
8. Purchased Star Wars Galactic Battlegrounds Complete at Walmart for $9.99.
9. Played Battleground.
10. Disappointed to discover Galactic Battlegrounds is Age of Kings with different sound effects.
11. Played Galactic Battleground anyway.
12. Looked up the cheat codes.
13. Played several battles where I made my enemy the Gungans. I played the Empire. Me so cruel.
14. Watched Alexander on pay-per-view while my family was away.
15. Wished I had that $3.99 back.
16. Wished I had those three hours back.
17. Considered blogging.
18. Ate a grinder.
19. Tried to start reading "Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde" seven times.
20. Considered mowing the grass.
21. Killed the biggest spider I have ever seen in a home. It was very crunchy. Like stepping in new-fallen snow, only unpleasant.
22. Watched Arrested Development, House, Simpsons. Enjoyed them roughly in that order.
23. Considered blogging.
24. Cleaned 1/2 of a room.
25. Received three magazines: Military History Quarterly, First Things, and National Geographic. Read parts of all three. Best line comes from First Things; the author quotes PG Wodehouse as (roughly) "She looked as if she had been poured into her dress and had forgotten to say when!" Reminded me of some proms that I have chaperoned. Actually, every prom that I have chaperoned.
Peace
23 September 2005
Whoo-hoo!
Just received:
An internal audit of our insurance billing and payroll withholding has revealed that we overwithheld for medical insurance in June and July of 2004. We are going to make an adjustment to your Sept 30 paycheck. We will withhold $237.62 LESS than we normally do. This should bring the withholding and billing back into line. Your Sept 30 net pay will be higher than Sept 15 for this time only. I'm sorry that we did not catch this error sooner.
Don't tell my wife.
An internal audit of our insurance billing and payroll withholding has revealed that we overwithheld for medical insurance in June and July of 2004. We are going to make an adjustment to your Sept 30 paycheck. We will withhold $237.62 LESS than we normally do. This should bring the withholding and billing back into line. Your Sept 30 net pay will be higher than Sept 15 for this time only. I'm sorry that we did not catch this error sooner.
Don't tell my wife.
22 September 2005
Name Tags
A couple of weeks ago I considered writing about nametags. I am not sure what prompted the thought, but I realized that I had never had a job that required a nametag. I have had many different jobs in my life, and I once had a job that required a security badge, but never one that required a nametag. While growing up, I had always looked a little jealously at my friends' nametags. They came with pin-on stars for years of service or stickers for good service or ribbons for excellence or buttons for random atta-boys. Recently, I grew proud and even a little vain about the fact that I had never held a nametag job. I began to look down on nametag wearers in general. I thought, "There but for the grace of God go I."
Today, I got my nametag. It has the name of my school, my name, and the fact that I am "HS Faculty" engraved in black lettering on a gold surface. It attaches to my shirt with three silver magnets. On the back is a warning, "Caution-Magnet Device: Do not use with a pacemaker."
I could be more accepting of this fate if it were a true ID badge, but anyone could put this on and pass themselves off as "HS Faculty". The students were merciless all day. "So, you work at a hotel now?" "Are you on the hospitality committee at your church?" "Yes, I would like fries with that." I think I could even embrace it if I knew that nifty nametag accessories are just down the road. A "Teacher of the Year" medallion would look quite spiffy suspended from the bottom of the nametag. Alas, no such perks will follow.
I suppose I deserve it. My arrogance and hubris have been pulled out of my heart by three powerful magnets.
If anyone asks, I will be at the cardiologist. I wonder how much a pacemaker would cost?
Today, I got my nametag. It has the name of my school, my name, and the fact that I am "HS Faculty" engraved in black lettering on a gold surface. It attaches to my shirt with three silver magnets. On the back is a warning, "Caution-Magnet Device: Do not use with a pacemaker."
I could be more accepting of this fate if it were a true ID badge, but anyone could put this on and pass themselves off as "HS Faculty". The students were merciless all day. "So, you work at a hotel now?" "Are you on the hospitality committee at your church?" "Yes, I would like fries with that." I think I could even embrace it if I knew that nifty nametag accessories are just down the road. A "Teacher of the Year" medallion would look quite spiffy suspended from the bottom of the nametag. Alas, no such perks will follow.
I suppose I deserve it. My arrogance and hubris have been pulled out of my heart by three powerful magnets.
If anyone asks, I will be at the cardiologist. I wonder how much a pacemaker would cost?
11 September 2005
Oldest Trick in the Book
I gave back to my freshmen their first tests. They had done reasonably well on a difficult test. We then went over the test, question by question, since their tests will serve as study guides for the final exam. Occasionally, a student thinks that they find a mistake that I made in grading the test. Sometimes they are correct, and I am happy to correct the mistake. Usually they are still wrong and were not paying attention. Rarely, they are trying to cheat.
One of my freshmen came up to me to show me that the "a" that she put on the matching had been marked wrong. Indeed, there was an "a" in the space, "a" was the correct answer, and I had marked it wrong with a red "X". It was a two point question. She had had a 68; two more points would give her a passing grade. The "a" looked suspiciously like an "o" with an added leg. A quick glance at the rest of her test showed that she had used upper case "A's" on the rest of her test (three other times) and never a lower cast "a". She had also not used an "o" on this section of matching. She was biting her fingernails as she stood waiting for my decision.
I was very disappointed. I expected more sophisticated cheating from our 21st century youth. Monday I will have to talk to her. If I can't get a confession, there will be nothing that I can do but guilt her and let her know that I am on to her (without actually saying it). These types of confrontations are very dangerous for teachers and can easily backfire. Accusations of cheating are usually met by parents with "shock and awe" directed at the accuser so one must be careful to avoid direct accusations. Little darlings never lie, cheat, or steal. They are "good kids" (ie don't drink, drug, smoke, , hold-up liquor stores, belong to gangs, or light things on fire), therefore they cannot do anything wrong. Application of the doctrine of the sin nature breaks down when it applies to children. As we all know, Romans 3:10 states as plain as day, "There is none righteous, no, not even one, except for my offspring" (emphasis added; words emphasized also added). My guess is that nearly every student cheats at least once and most cheat repeatedly by the time that they graduate high school. It is our nature to do whatever we can get away with if minimum risk is assured. Alas.
Peace
One of my freshmen came up to me to show me that the "a" that she put on the matching had been marked wrong. Indeed, there was an "a" in the space, "a" was the correct answer, and I had marked it wrong with a red "X". It was a two point question. She had had a 68; two more points would give her a passing grade. The "a" looked suspiciously like an "o" with an added leg. A quick glance at the rest of her test showed that she had used upper case "A's" on the rest of her test (three other times) and never a lower cast "a". She had also not used an "o" on this section of matching. She was biting her fingernails as she stood waiting for my decision.
I was very disappointed. I expected more sophisticated cheating from our 21st century youth. Monday I will have to talk to her. If I can't get a confession, there will be nothing that I can do but guilt her and let her know that I am on to her (without actually saying it). These types of confrontations are very dangerous for teachers and can easily backfire. Accusations of cheating are usually met by parents with "shock and awe" directed at the accuser so one must be careful to avoid direct accusations. Little darlings never lie, cheat, or steal. They are "good kids" (ie don't drink, drug, smoke, , hold-up liquor stores, belong to gangs, or light things on fire), therefore they cannot do anything wrong. Application of the doctrine of the sin nature breaks down when it applies to children. As we all know, Romans 3:10 states as plain as day, "There is none righteous, no, not even one, except for my offspring" (emphasis added; words emphasized also added). My guess is that nearly every student cheats at least once and most cheat repeatedly by the time that they graduate high school. It is our nature to do whatever we can get away with if minimum risk is assured. Alas.
Peace
06 September 2005
Bang the Bongo Slowly for Maynard G. Krebs
Bob Denver has passed away. The heros of my youth are slipping into history. Ronald Reagan, Pope John Paul II, James Doohan, Bob Denver... Who will be next? I feel like Bugs Bunny has died.
Rest in Peace Bob
Rest in Peace Bob
05 September 2005
Monday Miscellany
Wednesday night at dinner, my son told me that he wants to be a teacher like me and help me out at my school where he can use my markers. After that he aspires to be a T-Rex.
My son has a very small mole on his thumb. He thinks about it alot. For a long time he was convinced that it was a boo-boo. The other day in the car he came to a conclusion: "The mole on my thumb is a boo-boo mole because a real mole is an animole."
Last week, I kept waiting for someone to refer to the "New Orleans Insurgency" and suggest that we pull out of the quagmire. I began to write a mock story concerning it, but concluded it was too crass. Here was the beginning: "Forces of the US military are moving into the devastated city amid signs of growing lawlessness and looting. Critics of the administration claim that not enough thought was given to winning the cleanup. Representatives of so-called "looters" and "car-jackers" have requested that they be referred to as "insurgents", "revolutionaries" or "freedom fighters. A Kennedy said, 'At the very least, we need an exit strategy or we will risk bogging down like we did in Vietnam'. The Bush administration claims that the problems have been caused by troublemakers moving in from Alabama and Arkansas."
My son has a bad cold. Saturday night it gave him a headache. He thinks that ice cream is somehow connected. You see, eating ice cream, which is very cold, can give you brain-freeze (a painful headache). So "cold" gives you a headache. He knows that soup (which is hot) is usually given for a cold. The hot negates the cold and creates warm.
Peace
My son has a very small mole on his thumb. He thinks about it alot. For a long time he was convinced that it was a boo-boo. The other day in the car he came to a conclusion: "The mole on my thumb is a boo-boo mole because a real mole is an animole."
Last week, I kept waiting for someone to refer to the "New Orleans Insurgency" and suggest that we pull out of the quagmire. I began to write a mock story concerning it, but concluded it was too crass. Here was the beginning: "Forces of the US military are moving into the devastated city amid signs of growing lawlessness and looting. Critics of the administration claim that not enough thought was given to winning the cleanup. Representatives of so-called "looters" and "car-jackers" have requested that they be referred to as "insurgents", "revolutionaries" or "freedom fighters. A Kennedy said, 'At the very least, we need an exit strategy or we will risk bogging down like we did in Vietnam'. The Bush administration claims that the problems have been caused by troublemakers moving in from Alabama and Arkansas."
My son has a bad cold. Saturday night it gave him a headache. He thinks that ice cream is somehow connected. You see, eating ice cream, which is very cold, can give you brain-freeze (a painful headache). So "cold" gives you a headache. He knows that soup (which is hot) is usually given for a cold. The hot negates the cold and creates warm.
Peace
01 September 2005
Panic: Gas over $4.00 in Atlanta
Yesterday: "when the rules of society and civilization break down, we truly find out what kind of people we are." We are ugly people.
In other news: August is done. September is here. On opening my front door this morning, I was greeted by a grinning crescent moon and cool morning air.
In other news: August is done. September is here. On opening my front door this morning, I was greeted by a grinning crescent moon and cool morning air.
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